freelance worry consultant. eleven years of professional fretting for clients who cannot afford to ruminate on their own time.
ada@velourworries.example · (201) 555-0148 · brooklyn, ny · velourworries.example
I worry on behalf of organizations that have run out of time to do it themselves. Engagements range from a single 90-minute "what could go wrong" workshop to multi-quarter retainers in which I attend strategy meetings, raise my hand at the right moments, and softly say "have we considered..." until everyone in the room feels grounded again.
velour worries llc · 2019 – present · sole proprietor
Built a one-person consulting practice serving 34 clients across fintech, biotech, and one regional bakery chain. Hourly rate has tripled since launch. Have never missed a sleepless night.
Notable engagements: stress-tested a series-b pitch deck (the company raised, allegedly because of a single comma I added). Sat in on six quarters of board meetings at a mid-cap insurer. Talked one founder out of a dramatic rebrand by listing fourteen things that could go wrong with the new logo.
harland & cogburn strategy · 2016 – 2019 · associate then director
Hired as the firm's first full-time pessimism specialist. Promoted twice. Designed the now-famous "second tuesday" framework, in which any go/no-go decision must survive a meeting on a tuesday with no coffee.
Authored an internal memo titled twelve things i wish you would just consider that became required reading for new hires through the end of 2024.
a regional credit union · 2014 – 2016 · entry-level
Spent two years in a windowless office reading risk reports and deciding I could probably do this for a living. Reorganized the disaster recovery binder. Identified four single points of failure that were, at the time, "fine." They are no longer fine.
a bed and breakfast in vermont · 2012 – 2014 · weekends
Origin story. Spent every saturday night reconciling a small ledger and noticing things. The owner once said, "you are a deeply concerned young woman and you should bill people for it." She is still my second-most-quoted client.
columbia university · 2014
Thesis: "the value of the pessimist in early-stage product teams," later cited in three trade publications and one wedding toast.
vassar college · 2012
Senior project on stoicism. Minor in statistics, which my advisor described, generously, as "a useful counterweight."
| year | event | talk |
|---|---|---|
| 2025 | south by southwest | "the case for slowing down on a tuesday" |
| 2024 | strategy unconference, austin | "premortems are not punishments" |
| 2023 | fintech foresight summit | "every dashboard hides a worry" |
| 2022 | a podcast you've heard of | "why my whole job is one long sigh" |
Ada walked into our quarterly review, said one sentence — "i'm worried about january" — and saved us roughly nine million dollars. I have no idea how. I'm afraid to ask. former cfo, a series-d company that prefers not to be named